July 9, 2012

Without You I'm Nothing

This is a picture of my little brother and I sometime around 1980.  I was probably seven which made him close to four.  When you are that age you have no idea the impact you might have on your little brother, hell I still have no idea if I made any impact on him. You can't really make out the words too well on my sweatshirt but the Zero is saying to the One in the number 10, "Without you I'm nothing." 

Sometimes I feels as if it's that way with Carter and his older brother.  Carter knows no other life than that with Tyler.  As long as he has been alive his older brother has been there right beside him.  Tyler had those two years without Carter and I don't know if he remembers any of it, but I almost feel as if he learned to be a little more self sufficient in the time before Carter was born.  Drawing comes more naturally, playing video games is a cinch to him, and he picked up reading much quicker than Carter seems to be doing. 

Carter has relied on Tyler. 

Whenever he needs help with something, he goes right to his big brother.  Not that Tyler is a huge help all of the time, but he will step in and help his little brother out.  That is of course when wants to, which when you are the older brother, can get pretty annoying when there is someone screaming at you for help.

Why is Carter wearing sunglasses? Because Tyler is.
Carter is the worlds biggest copycat.  If Tyler is walking around without a shirt on, Carter does the same.  If he is wearing sneakers instead of his usual Crocs, Carter has to follow suit.  You get the idea, whatever Tyler does, Carter is sure to follow.

It comes back to that sweatshirt.

What would Carter be without his older brother? Certainly he wouldn't be nothing.  But how much different would he be without Tyler living right by his side.  This is something we won't know about for years to come when Tyler heads off to college.  I don't know how Carter is going to react to the fact that he won't be living under the same roof as his older brother.

He might just be lost.

Carter has the idea he will be living with Tyler for the rest of his life.  In fact he said as much by saying that when he gets bigger and graduates college, he's going to move in with him.  Upon hearing that, Tyler said that if that is indeed the case, he is going to make Carter pay all of the property taxes.

Payback I guess.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?



  1. My Little was more thrilled than any of the rest of us could possibly be, when my Big Boy decided not to move out yet. He is staying home & attending classes at the local community college, which pleases all of us, but the Little most of all. She wants to marry her big brother, lolz... He is a hero in her eyes. The eleven-year difference might have something to do with that. ;p

  2. Give it time. Soon enough they won't be able to stay away from each other far enough. Enjoy this.

  3. My boys are 14 months apart.  And most days I have to keep them from killing each other.... literally.  But then there are those rare moments when they plan to get a dog, when they have their own place.

    After of course, they have lived with us long enough to save ALL the money to buy a place together so they won't have  a mortgage.

  4. Don't get me wrong... they want to kill each other too, at least the younger one does.

  5. There are moments between the two, but I think that Carter would have no idea what to do without his older brother.

  6. I love that he is going to make his brother pay property taxes. So funny!

  7. In our area that can get pricey.

  8.  Being an only child in life has its advantages and its drawbacks. Growing up there were times I would have done anything for a sibling. I know there were other times I was grateful not to have one.

    Fast forward and now I am a father of one child, my son. I often worry about the fact he has no siblings and prospects are bleak for anymore. We had far to hard of a time just having him (thus I am an older parent of a 3-year-old.)

    I like to believe he will be okay and learn to be more self reliant and independent. I also worry though as he gets older what it will feel like to have no one to call on. I will tell you John, I think your sons are lucky to be brothers and you are lucky to be a brother.  Just my opinion of course :)


  9. Great post and makes me think about my own boys. 3 years apart, and (obviously) same situation where the youngest knows no life without his older brother. But in our house, the almost 2yo very nearly runs the show at this point and it's scary. He could care less what anyone else is doing and marches to his own beat, and the almost 5yo picks up on that vibe and want to copy HIM. So crazy.

    Oh, and you and your brother are rocking some pretty sweet cords in that pick. Well done.

  10. Thanks Aaron! I liked having a brother most of the time and I am sure my kids are happy to have each other.

  11. It's the clothes that make the man. I was corduroys!

  12. What a great question.  I wonder if my kids will be close when they're older.  I was the oldest by quite a few years (I was an oops) so I don't know what it's like to look up to an older sibling.  I also wonder if having one of each will make it harder for them to really bond.  So many questions.  Guess we'll just wait and see.