Two for Tuesday

The purpose of this is to discuss two completely unrelated topics and package them together nicely into a little ball. Soccer and ear hair don't always go together, but for the purpose of this post they might as well.



My son Tyler is on the absolute worst soccer team. I know that leagues have no idea who players are before they bunch everyone together but it's ridiculous how bad a team can be. It was the same thing last fall and I am beginning to think it's a conspiracy against me and my son. The games are so one sided it's somewhat tortuous to watch. There are rules in place to prevent games from getting too out of hand, but when you play my sons team there is not too much you can do. Today's game was even played with an extra player on my sons team and they still lost 9-0. I guess there is always next year.



I am starting to lose the battle with ear hair. Fortunately it's not to the point of the picture above, but it's enough to annoy you. I can only picture really old men with those unsightly nose and ear hairs hanging out of their heads and I am not ready to be one of those guys. I am a 37 year old and I certainly don't want to look any older than that. Running a blog you are able to see how people are arriving at your site. On numerous occasions people have found my site googling "hairy daddy". Now I don't know why all these people are looking for hairy daddies but hopefully after this post I will lock up the "hairy daddy ears" crowd. Since soccer is clearly not in the cards for me, I have to have something to shoot for right?

That's my twofer.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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My Old Life

WPIX TV... the Old and still sometimes stomping grounds

I really don't know how I survived my old life. For six years I worked early mornings in television news and when I say early I was out the door of my house everyday at 1:45 AM! The morning shift in television can be brutal, there is a reason why people work a normal nine to five as the human body can only take so much. Most people wondered why I would do that, and if their was even news at that hour. I asked myself those questions a lot. For most in our business the morning show was a death sentence, nothing could be worse. Trust me, when I left last July I was burned out.

This is what I stared at everyday

Buttons and monitors were my life

I started on that shift after the birth of my first child as a way of maximizing parental involvement and minimizing the use of daycare. There were parts of that schedule that were great, I did get to see my kids more than most working dads, but I was a zombie half the time and not always fun to be around. The sleep deprivation really took it's toll on my mind and body. While the kids gave me lots of joy I found myself falling asleep with them playing around me, not the quality time that I expected.

I was, at the time, essentially a stay at home dad with another full time job. I would come home from work at around 11:00 and begin my other job, which at the time I wasn't very good at. Whether or not I have improved in my domestic abilities is still debatable, but my focus now can be on chores at home and not having to worry about squeezing a nap in before the kids get home.

Live at the Hoboken Path Station

I go back into the office every now and then when they need me, which has not been all that often, but enough to remind me of what my life was like. I did like my job, I liked the creativity and I liked being in the center of it all. There really is some about working in television that gets in your blood that keeps you coming back. I am sitting here right now at work after dragging my but out of bed at 1:30AM and while there is plenty I do miss, the one thing I don't ever miss is the hours, they suck.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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My Moms

I am fortunate to have so many great ladies in my life and would be remiss to mention them this Mother's Day. My boys are lucky to have them in their lives and each one has shaped them in some way.

My mother Bonnie and Tyler at Memorial Day Parade in Geneseo

My mother-in-law Maxine with Tyler at Kindergarten graduation

Aunt Tracy with Carter on the day he was born

My wife Jennifer, the best mother a boy could have

Each of these Mothers is great in their own way.  My mom is the quintessential grandmother, I only wish the boys could see her more.  Their other grandmother Nanny, who is always there when needed and never hesitates to offer help.  Aunt Tracy is the aunt everyone wishes they had, she has been like a mother to my boys.  And then there is my wife, Jenn, who is the best mother a boy could ever ask for.  She doesn't get to see them as much as she would like, but always makes sure the boys are having fun.  She has sacrificed a lot for us to make sure that we have the life we live, and for that I am truly grateful.

Great Adventure

In Aruba

Lake Como

Montacino

Tyler at around 9 months

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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What's in a name?

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet." - Juliet

Does a name really define us?  Am I a John?  Would I be any different if I was a Jacob?   Who knows.  There are millions of names and it seems like more are invented every day.  Parents don't want their kid to have the same name as everyone else, so what do they do?  Instead of naming their kid Madison, they name their kid Madyson.  See how they did that.  They put a "Y" where the "I" should be.  Boy that really shakes things us.  Guess what?  Their name is still Madison, only you won't be able to find a license plate with your kids name on it.

Picking a name can be an almost impossible task.  You really are deciding the course of history for your child.  Sure you could go with the obvious and just name your kid Junior, or name them Sophia after your dead great grandmother whose dying wish was to see her name live on.  Once you take those out, where do you go?  My wife always loved the name Jake.  The problem is so does everyone else.  Take a look at the top ten boys names for last year according to the Social Security Administration.

1. Jacob
2. Ethan
3. Michael
4. Jayden
5. William
6. Alexander
7. Noah
8. Daniel
9. Aiden
10. Anthony

I think everyone in child bearing age had a thing for Jake Ryan from "16 Candles" growing up.  There really is no other way to explain it.  We know four Jakes so thank God when our first son was born, we decided on Tyler.  It's a solid name that is somewhat popular but not one thats crazy like Justus, which is #853 on the list.  I have yet to meet a Justus and it is safe to say that I never will, although there are more than one of you out there, so who knows.  We came up with Tyler because my wife used to work as a reporter in television and her on air name, more for security purposes than anything else, was Tyler.  It was obvious.


When our second son was born it was a little more difficult.  We wanted a solid name and again not one that was too popular.  We thought that we came up with a cool but unusual name.  When we worked in Elmira, New York we covered a standoff in a crazy little town called Addison.  It was the place that actually kick started our relationship and took it to the next level.  So we thought, there are no Addisons that we know,  how about that?  Well it turns out there was a popular character on Grey's Anatomy and everyone decided to name their GIRL Addison in 2007.  It was the eleventh most popular name that year, FOR A GIRL.  So we turned to another TV show full of doctors and named him Carter, after ER's John Carter.  Now maybe it wasn't completely after him but I always did like his character.

Its hard coming up with names, especially with my last name, Willey.  You don't want to go through life with the wrong name like Jack Knopf, Harry Weiner.  MY BROTHERS NAME IS DICK.  My parents settled on John and my wife is a Jennifer, two pretty generic names but in the 70's there weren't two more popular names.  In fact John was the #6 most popular boys name when I was born in 1973, and remains to this day the second most popular name in the country behind James.  There are over 5,00,000 people with my name in this country!  Here I thought I was special.  Jennifer was #1 when my wife was born in 1974 and there are close to 1.3 million women with her name making her name the fifth most popular name of all time.  Incidentally everyone named their daughter Mary in the 40's, 50's and the 60's and that to this day is by far the most popular name in the country for women.  I actually don't know any Mary's as most of them are in their 60's ad 70's.

I can't help but think what this baby name list might look like in 100 years.  There will be more Jacobs and Emmas in this country than anyone. Grandmothers will all be named Brittany or Courtney, instead of Dorothy or Evelyn.  I can see it now, people are going to start naming their kids John and Jennifer because they want to come up with a unique name, a name that no one uses.

Rose by the way is the 76th most popular name of all time.  There are over 194,000 of you out there.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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What is it?

Being a Daddy in Charge means I have a lot of responsibilities. One of those is obviously taking care of the grocery shopping. I can't say that I do a very good job of it, because everyone complains about the food that I make. The kids like their food one way and the wife expects me to offer her a gourmet meal every night, as if that's what the moms in my situation do. Anyway sometimes you come across stuff at the store that leaves your head scratching.

Yucca or yucky?

This is apparently a Yucca root or something to that extent? I don't think it would ever be something that found it's way to my table. Someone must eat it because it's always at the store, unless it's the same one week after week and they are just playing some cruel joke on us. What the heck are you supposed to do with this thing? Apparently it has the texture of the potato or something. Well if that's the case can't we just stick to the potato? Will the Earths entire ecosystem be thrown into an unbalance if we got rid of this "food"? If it is going to stick around you have to change the name, my kids will never eat something with a name like Yucca.

Malaga or malady

I for the life of me have never seen this plant, is it a plant? It feels like a canteloupe that's been rotting on my countertop for over a month. I handed it to my son and he almost threw up. Can you even make anything with a Malaga? If anyone knows what I can do with it, I would love to know.

Celery something?

This is some sort of celery bulb. There are only two places that celery should be used, in soups and in tuna (sometimes). Otherwise is there a more disgusting vegetable? You can plaster it with all the peanut butter you want, it still taste like celery. By the way who thought that celery and peanut butter made a good combination. So if celery sucks, I can't imagine a big blob of it would taste any better. Maybe I am wrong.

Midget bananas

Seriously, mini bananas? Let the things grow! What's wrong with a normal sized banana? These are just a tease. My son told me that these things only belong on peoples heads like from the movie Rio. I think he is right.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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A Daddy's in Charge Foolproof Recipe #1

In a follow up to last nights entry I decided to feed the boys again. I thought that I would share with you one of the recipes that my boys like the most. I have pretty much perfected this recipe as it is the only thing that I know the boys will eat. It's a pretty simple recipe, one that should take no more than 15 minutes.

Daddy's in Charge? Pasta With Butter

First step is to boil the water, if this takes more than seven minutes you should have your stove checked.

Second step is to add the pasta, feel free to substitute any variety. In this case tonight I got a little crazy and used those yolkless egg noodles. I know it's a risky idea but one I was willing to take.

Set the timer for 9:00. You could go longer depending on your pasta variety. This where it gets a little tricky though, cook it until your timer beeps.

Strain pasta to remove any excess water.

Add butter. You could use some other substitute but I find it tastes better with butter. I think my boys would agree.

Serve it to your children and watch them go crazy.

It's a pretty simple recipe and one that can easily be mastered through trial and error. I will share with you exclusive recipes in the future, ones that I am sure your kids will love, and you will love making. If you have any to share I would love to hear them and give them a try.

Happy Eating!

If you have your own nonsense recipe to share feel free to link up over at Solitary Mama where she is always dishing up good stuff.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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A Tale of Two Doctors

We have the best of doctors and the worst of doctors.  While Dickens didn't have this in mind it surely fits the bill when it comes to our boys doctor's office.  Our doctor is the best, someone that came highly recommended, and I can see why.  He is just one of those guys that makes you feel like nothing is ever wrong.  You could walk in with your arm completely chopped off and he would magically make you think that there was nothing wrong as if this thing happens to kids all the time.  I don't think that I have ever walked out of HIS office feeling like I got the wrong diagnosis.  I trust him.

Our awesome doctor, Dr. Shih with Carter

That being said we don't always get to see OUR doctor.  Since he is so great, everyone wants to be seen by him, which leaves us sometimes with some of the other doctors in the practice, other doctors that I don't care about in the least, or worse I don't trust.

My oldest son Tyler got hit by allergies pretty bad this spring.  Like a lot of people it turns out he is allergic to pollen.  We had gone on vacation two and a half weeks ago to DC and their pollen season starts a little before ours does in New Jersey, so he got smacked in the face by it.  He only developed these allergies last year so we weren't fully prepared for it.  Back then he was diagnosed with seasonal allergies and we were told to give him Zyrtec or any of the other medications available.  While the symptoms of the allergies lessened other complications arose including a cough that just would not go away.  Which brings us to the doctor in question.

Last year said doctor told us we should get Tyler on an inhaler for his cough.  Like any parent we listened and got him one.  Well that only made Tyler's cough worse, to the point that he would cough for like a minute straight, it was quite aggravating as we don't want to see our child go through anything like this, especially Tyler who has had problems in the past.  I should have known the inhaler was the wrong way to go as this doctor has had us get a nebulizer three times.  I swear you could walk in with a broken arm and this doctor would prescribe some sort of breathing apparatus.  He must think that every child that walks through the doors of his office is asthmatic.  Well since the inhaler obviously didn't work we saw OUR doctor a week later and he said that had a sinus infection, caused most likely by the allergies.  Two weeks later and a course of amoxicillin and Tyler was as good as new.

Fast forward a year later, and we are seeing the same doctor last Friday.  Tyler had all the same problems that he had last year and I explained all this to Dr. Doolittle(butprescribeunecessarymedicine) and I told him I thought it was a sinus infection.  Well, he told me it wasn't that and it was just allergies worsening.  While he didn't prescribe an inhaler or nebulizer, although he did ask us if we ever used one, he said a couple shots of Nasanex in the nostrils every night would do the trick.  I should have known better, this only made Tyler cough more and since we gave it to him before bedtime, this was a problem.  I took him back to the doctor last night and saw another doctor in the practice, not OUR doctor, but one that I trust.  After analyzing Tyler and hearing about his symptoms he diagnosed him with a sinus infection.  How could he ever think that?  Of course the two weeks of amoxicillin just started but I can't help but feel Tyler will be back to normal in no time.  That doctor could obviously be wrong too but I don't think so.

I know that being a doctor is an incredibly hard job, and they see all kinds of sick kids in the course of the day, but to have one that you don't trust is frightening.  You essentially put the lives of your children in the hands of these people, thinking that they know what is right for your child.  I am not a doctor, so I can only listen to what they have to say and trust that they know what they are talking about.  That being said, I will never take my sons to that doctor again, I don't trust him.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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My Boys Can Feed Themselves

I know what you are thinking, my kids are almost seven and four years old of course they can feed themselves. Well I know they aren't babies and they can FEED themselves, but I am saying that I am done, THEY CAN FEED THEMSELVES. Dinner is way too much of a battle to deal with and I can't do it anymore.



You would think throwing a couple of slices of pizza in front of them would do the trick, especially after they asked for it, but again the pizza sits almost all uneaten. It seems like this almost everynight and it's not like we are throwing porridge or liver in front of them. Even nights where I put macaroni and cheese on their plates it goes half uneaten.



When they do decide to eat dinner turns into a Seder like event lasting well over an hour. All I ask is that someone come to my house at around 5:30, cook for them and feed them. I am going to happy hour and I will be back by bedtime. The two hours around dinner time are THE most frustrating two hours in my day. I would much rather subject myself to watching a marathon of The View than having to deal with this. Thank God I only have to do it seven days a week!

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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Osama Bin Laden is Dead

It's days like today that you are proud to wake up and call yourself an American. Our boys in the military have finally done what many thought might never happen. It was quite a shock when I woke up this morning at 1:30 to hear the news, Osama Bin Laden was dead.

Veteran Reporter Marvin Scott reporting from Times Square

Today just so happened to be a day that I was scheduled to work. I quit my Television News Photographer job nine months ago to take care of my kids and I have been back at the station on a freelance basis a total of four times since. What a day to go back and to be thrust in the middle of it, Times Square. I usually hate large crowds, but I can make an exception for today's flag waving celebration.  Any day I can see everyone united is a great day!

I can't believe that it has almost been 10 years since that horrible September day. Working in news in New York City the question always came up as to where I was that day. I had no story, I was scheduled to work in the afternoon and by the time that I actually got out of bed the first tower had already been hit. I, like a lot of people, watched the events unfold from home half thinking I NEED to be in the city, and half thanking my lucky stars that I wasn't there. My wife was working in the city at the time and hearing the uncertainty of what was going on in her voice, and the panic that everyone was feeling, it was not something I wanted to be a part of.  There was a part of me though that wished I was there, I was a journalist after all and there was no bigger story than what was transpiring on that day.

It took me until the next day to finally get into work. Fifteen hour days were the norm that week and most of my time was spent following families from hospital to hospital looking for lost family members. I remember working with Julian Phillips the day after the attacks following one family in particular. We must have gone to five hospitals searching for any word of their lost relative, with no luck.  It was a pretty draining day for me as this was the closest I would come to knowing anyone that was lost that day. I only knew of one person that worked in the towers and she was fortunately having a prescheduled doctors appointment that morning.   She most likely would have been in the towers had that not been the case. I was lucky. The same could not be said for the families of the over 3,000 people that died that day.

I think about all that has changed in the past ten years. No longer am I the 27 year old newlywed with no kids, I am now 37, married for over ten years, with two awesome kids. I enjoyed a successful career in television news but my days are now spent as a stay at home dad raising my two boys (and writing about them). I am fortunate to get this time with them as I also think about the many kids that were born after their fathers were killed in the attacks. There were too many stories of firefighters who left pregnant wives behind and countless stories of little kids that lost their father or mother that day. I don't know how people were able to cope, but as they say time heals all wounds.  This one though was a big one, one I am not so sure even 10 years could heal.

I think also of all the people that lost their kids that day, a parent having to bury their child has got to be the worst thing imaginable, and I pray to God it's something I will never have to do. If I lost my child you might as well take the life out of me.  We spoke to Lee Ielpi this morning who lost a firefighter son in the attacks, and while he was elated to hear the news of Bin Laden's death, it still would never bring back his best friend, his son Jonathan.

As the events of the past day unfold I am also reminded of the type of place this country was in the days and months after the attack. There was no black, white, Jewish, Catholic, Republican, Democrat, there was AMERICAN. We were united under one flag, everyone bled red, white, and blue. Somewhere in the past ten years all that changed. We forgot about what brought us together and started arguing about every issue under the sun. Not everything has to be about politics, but I am afraid that is what it has come to in this country.

Now that Bin Laden is dead, my hope is that for at least a few days we can put all of our differences aside and focus on one thing, how great it is to be an American.  My kids live in the best country in the world and I want to keep it that way.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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Silent Sunday

Sunday Mornings used to be all about reading

Unfortunately there is no time for that anymore or:

I wish that I could go to

But I don't.  In the fall all dads should be parked in front of the TV watching

But I am not.  I've got these little guys

And that's alright with me.  So everyone

And in honor of May Day I offer you this great call!

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?

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