June 3, 2011

I am a Garbage Man

Somewhere along the way, on top of everything else, I became a garbage man. Now I don't drive a truck and I have never been to the dump but everyday my pockets are full of junk. It's like I am a chipmunk shoving nuts in my mouth, that sounds pretty bad I know, but in this case I am just filling my pockets with garbage.

These shorts used to be great when the kids were little and I could throw in binkies, diapers, wipes, and whatever else I needed. I didn't carry around a big diaper bag, I would just throw everything in my cargo shorts. I used to have like three or four binkies and whenever one got dirty out came another one clean as my mouth would allow it.

I have no need for all that diaper changing stuff anymore, so my pockets are now filled mostly with candy wrappers and straws from the various juice boxes my kids suck down. Try digging into your pockets at the 7/11 looking for money, I pull out everything but. Unfortunately they don't accept Reese's Pieces wrappers as currency, who knew?

If it's not the wrappers it the receipts that prove I paid for the candy in the first place. I might as well have one pocket for garbage and the other for recycling although I don't know if I would be able to separate my plastics and my bottles.

John Willey - Daddy's in Charge?



  1. at least it's not landing in the floor of your car! Remind your wife of that the next time there is a spat. You care about you car enough to fill your pockets with garbage. She'll have to laugh, and you'll win the fight!

  2. You should see my purse! It's due for it's weekly cleaning. The purse is the only reason my pockets are clean :)